"So let us come boldly to the throne of our gracious God.  There we will receive His mercy, and we will find grace to help us when we need it most."

Hebrews 4:16

In North Carolina it's that time of year dreaded by children, teachers, and parents from the first day of school in August.  It's that time when students are instructed to "get plenty of rest and eat a healthy breakfast".  Parents do their best to encourage their children without stressing them out about the importance of a test that can essentially cause them to repeat a grade.  And teachers and staff just try to stay sane while their "performance" is judged based on their students' scores.  What could insight such dread, fear, and stressfulness?.....EOGs, of course!! 

With three sons, we've had our share of End of Grade tests over the years since they began, and I can definitively say, "We're NOT fond!!".  We've always told our boys to do their best but not to let it stress them out.  Easy for us to say!!  They know what these tests mean and, though they put on a good face and pretend not to be worried, they get a little unnerved.

I have a lot of friends in the same boat and over the years we've made it a habit to pray for eachothers' children and the teachers and staff along with our own kids.  We text, email, and call one another with encouraging words and prayers.  This year has been no different.  I have two boys taking EOGs and one taking an AP exam.   So with my work cut out for me, I sat down with my prayer journal this morning ready to call on the One who can bring peace to the worried heart. 

Most of the time when I pray for others I say something like, "Lord, I lift up so and so to you".  But, for some reason, today I pictured God sitting on His throne with Jesus at His right side and me actually taking each of my children to the throne to be blessed.  I've seen numerous movies depicting a priest or a king surrounded by throngs of people seeking "blessings".  But never have I seen God in such a way.  I can't count the times I've read the words of Hebrews 4:16.  But it never occurred to me how very literal they are.

Today God gave me a glimpse into the Heavenlies.  I took my children right to His feet and He blessed them!   He touched them with His hand of blessing and peace.   Yeah, I know, it's just EOGs.  But contrary to what the evil one would have us believe, our God cares about every detail.  He wants us to "come boldly"!  I am so thankful that He does.  So much of parenting is learning that you cannot be everything for your children.  You cannot be with them and protect them 24/7....but HE CAN!   And at His throne "we will find grace to help us when we need it most."

Blessings,

Ann-Marie





I smell rain!!

Whenever I read the story of Noah in Genesis chapter six I can't help but put myself there in the situation.  Most of the time I've imagined stepping into Noah's wife's shoes.  What would my reaction be if Brad came home one day and told me that God had told him to build an "ark".  The ark here is metaphoric for anything that seems straight-up crazy!  I think the support of Noah's wife can be attributed to a little detail tucked away in Genesis 6:9  "...and he walked in close fellowship with God."  She knew she could trust her husband because she knew he walked with the Lord.  Considering this puts the story into perspective for me, and I am able to say that I would support Brad's "ark" whatever it may be.

Lately though, I have been putting myself in Noah's sandals!  Sure, his family was supportive but that was it!!!  Not another person, not a single friend, no one else ON THE EARTH believed him!  In fact, I imagine they outright mocked him.  They probably took great joy in sitting around laughing about the crazy old man building a boat and claiming his God told him to do it.  The women probably stood around the well and gossiped about his wife and how they pitied her and her loony husband.  But Noah never wavered!  The Bible never records an instance of doubt on his part.  "Did God really say that???"  He had walked with the Lord enough to know His voice.  He knew God's character.  He knew he could trust Him.

Noah could smell rain!!

I, too, have heard God's voice.  Countless times in my life He has spoken, and, although I have not always obeyed without hesitation, I have learned to trust.  There were times when His directives were exciting, times when they scared me to death.  When He said leave your family and friends and move to another state I thought He was crazy!  When He said stop homeschooling I thought I would die.  When He said move your family to Mexico we were scared and our family thought WE were crazy! But in all of these instances, no matter how scared I was, no matter how crazy I thought God was, or people thought I was...

I could smell rain!

It's one of those times in my life when, it's not raining yet, but I'm going public with my "ark"!  Many years ago God put a desire in my heart, a burden for the orphan.  He and I have had an ongoing conversation about it for several years now.  More than once I've been ready to jump in head first and He has held me back.  We've been sitting on the shore together and He has been teaching me things.  I've learned things I didn't even know I needed to learn.  I've learned things I didn't want to learn.  I've given up my will for His.  I've gained even more trust in Him.  I've run off without Him and came back to find Him patiently waiting for me.  I've told Him my plans and how I want this whole thing to work out.  He has patiently listened and lovingly shown me His plan! 

Now, the construction begins.  It's out in the open.  People are becoming aware.  I'm thrilled to death and scared to death at the same time!  He hasn't given me the full blueprint.  He reveals it just a little at a time.  I step out in faith and He reveals the next step.  I have no idea what the finished project will look like, but

I can smell rain!!

I covet your prayers!  Please pray for our family as we emb"ark" (oh that's cheesy!!) on this new adventure.  Pray that we would continue to be led by God and not step out on our own.  Pray for the child/children that He will eventually bring into our home.  Pray for God to be glorified in EVERYTHING we do.

Wisdom

"I love all who love me.  Those who search will surely find me.  I have riches and honor as well as enduring wealth and justice.  My gifts are better than gold, even the purest gold, my wages better than sterling silver!  I walk in righteousness, in paths of justice.  Those who love me inherit wealth.  I will fill their treasures."

Proverbs 8:17-21

One of my greatest desires of God is wisdom.  Looking back over years of prayer journals, that is the one request most often seen.  Today He reminded me that He hears that prayer.  All I have to do is ask and He is prepared to pour it out like water in the desert. 

This week I purchased the devotional Jesus Calling by Sarah Young.  It's already changed my quiet time with the Lord!  The premise of this book is that Sarah has recorded her conversations with God over a period of time, specifically what He has said to her.  It is written as if Jesus is speaking.  Awesome! 

I've always struggled with my prayer time being one sided, me doing all the talking.  No comments from the peanut gallery here!  What I've realized through this book is that I can still write and be listening.  After I read whatever He leads me to that day, I then record what He is telling me through that particular passage or verse.  I begin with "Dear Ann-Marie" as if He is writing me a letter.  Wow!!  

God is ALWAYS speaking.  I am NOT always listening!   But thankfully, He is a generous and loving Father, ready, willing, and able to give me wisdom.  The means of blessing are as varied as His creation.  This week He used a book, an author, to bestow me with a bit more wisdom and I am so very grateful.  

FYI, this is what He said to me today:

Dear Ann-Marie,

The desire you have for wisdom will bring you blessings beyond measure.  You will gain more knowledge, insight, and understanding.  As you focus on Me and our relationship, you will experience peace in every aspect of your life.  Even in the trials and the difficulties ...Peace!!  You will SEE blessings that you would miss otherwise.

Seek Me and you WILL find Me! 

Hi Ho, Hi Ho...

This is my firstborn.  He's fourteen now and much taller than his mamma, but he's still very much my baby. 

That's why today was a bitter sweet day for me.

Today my baby "went to work" for the first time!

Brandon has been talking for months now about wanting to find a summer job.  That's all fine and good, but he's only fourteen!

But he has refused to let his age be a deterrent.

So, long story short, he called his cousin who has some connections with the local farmers.

 Sure enough, cuz hooked him up and today he worked his little hiney off loading hay.

(somewhere around 1200 square bales between 6 guys!)

When I picked him up this afternoon he was covered in so much hay and dirt I barely recognized him.

But I wasn't thinking so much about his appearance as I was thinking,

"My little boy is becoming a man!"

As proud as I am of my son for wanting to work and working so hard, there is another part of me that is so reluctant to accept this new stage of his life.

I know that him having a job makes him that much less dependant on me and that is scary.

I know that my children are on loan from God and He has a perfect plan for each of their lives.  So as they race their way to independence I pray!

  I pray that God will give me the strength to give them wings.

This Man

Allow me to introduce My Man.

I've been his bride for nearly 17 years and yet I'm still amazed.

I'm amazed that I found this man.  I wish I could tell you that I prayed for him my whole life.

 I wish I could tell you that I sought God wholeheartedly on the subject of a future spouse.  No, I'm afraid I

was quite a bit more selfish in those days.  I knew what I wanted in a husband, but I had no idea what God wanted in my husband !

Thankfully, my momma had my back!  Little did I know, as I was growing up, momma and God had

a lot of talks.  Despite the fact that I was not seeking God's guidance in this area, she was! 

And, not only was a young mom in Michigan praying for the future husband of her little girl.  In a little town in North Carolina another momma was praying for her son's future wife.

In my wildest dreams I never could have imagined this man! 

 I tell him often that he is perfect...for me, and I really believe that. 

God knew what I needed and wanted better than I ever did. 

My Man and I take every chance we get to tell young people and their parents

to pray for their future spouses!

We also thank our mommas often.  :)

Be Careful What You Pray For!

I WONDER
by Ruth Harms Calkin

You know, Lord, how I serve you

With great emotional fervor

In the limelight.

You know how eagerly I speak for you

At a women's club.

You know how I effervesce when I promote

A fellowship group.

You know my genuine enthusiasm

At a Bible study.

But how would I react, I wonder

If you pointed to a basin of water

And asked me to wash the calloused feet

Of a bent and wrinkled old woman

Day after day

Month after month

In a room where nobody saw

And nobody knew.

Lately as I pray for my children, I've been particularly burdened to pray for their humility. I know they're kids and humility is a stretch. But my personal struggles with the beast of pride and the falls that resulted have left an indelible scar that I do not want my children to bear in their own lives. Put simply, I would much rather they humble themselves than for God to be forced to humble them!

Well, as they say, "Be careful what you pray for!" As so often is the case, God turned the tables on me. After a few days of earnestly pleading for my children in this area and asking Him to give them a sincere desire to seek His glory rather than their own, God asked me a question. "Ann-Marie, are you modeling humility for your children?"

AWWWW, nuts!!! I was really hopeful He was just going to take care of this one for me. You know, "let go and let God!" I was humbly admitting that I couldn't change their hearts! And, after 14 years of motherhood, I knew no amount of me talking would change anything. So I was taking it to the One who can get through to them and can change their hearts. But with all these years under my belt, I should have also known that He always uses our relationships with our children to teach us about our relationship with Him.

In the weeks that have followed, I have taken an honest and difficult look at myself. Wow! All I can say is, "Thank you, Father!" Thank you for your mercy and your love in spite of my prideful ways. He daily gives me so many opportunities to model humility and true servanthood and I'm ashamed to say that MANY times I have literally turned my nose up in response. I've even joked that everyone can't be a servant or there would be no one to serve. OUCH!

I'm happy to report that my prayers for my children have changed. I now ask God to change me and my heart so that I can model for my children humility and true servanthood. And just like I am powerless to change my boys' hearts, I am powerless to change my own. But PRAISE THE LORD, He is able!!!

Remember...Be Careful What You Pray For!!

P.S. Leave a comment and you could win a prize!!! I just finished reading a great book by Christian speaker and author, Lysa TerKeurst entitled, Becoming More Than A Good Bible Study Girl. I couldn't put it down! In fact, I loved it so much I want to give away a copy. So leave a comment and become a follower of the blog and I'll pick one random person to win her own copy of the book. Be sure and leave your name and a way for me to contact you.

Have a blessed one...

Ann-Marie